M2F2M

All advice sums to zero. De Mello talks about letting go of the formulas. Don't board the bus, sit with the shades down, and miss the scenery that is life. Once you adopt someone else's formula, you start seeing a little less of life, your awareness diminishes. So......... I probably need to stop absorbing so much content. Yes, that is indeed what I will do over the next week. I am going on a long car trip tomorrow, and I had intended on listening to a few mind expanding podcasts, but I need a break. I need to sit with some ideas, write about them, digest them, then see what my authentic self makes of it all. What prompted the thoughts around this post was Naval's wealth advice regarding avoiding rank battles (where possible, he acknowledged that some are unavoidable) -> go for wealth creation. This advice resonated with me. I'm not a type A personality. I have a creative side in me, a force that needs nurture in the form of time and energy. So I don't want to be...

 So the results are in. Apparently I won. I'm getting my way. I fought and succeeded. Bit of a relief, but also a bit of a let down. Then the post analysis plays out. The monster I was walking with - are they really a monster? Or do they just have some broken moist robot issues? What is their self esteem like? What is their home life like? Is this defeat going to send them into a spiral? If they are on mental health medication (it seems like everyone is these days) will they need to up the dose? Life is messy messy messy. I think the amount of reflection I do, and the discussions I have, hopefully mitigate the chances of me becoming the thing I am trying to avoid. That is my hope anyway. As the farmer says to the crowd who keep visiting him to tell him how fortunate or unfortunate he is.  "We'll see." 

 Continuation.... So you've assessed the situation. You need to fight. Draw that line in the sand. Stem the tide. Prevent a worse case scenario from playing out. You go to battle. Armour is polished, swords are sharpened. A strategy has been developed and tactics implemented. The first shot is fired.   The fog of war descends. Warrior mode.  Warrior mode isn't that pleasant to be honest. It is not my natural style, not my cup of tea. I'll go there though if I have to. I prefer to be co operative, again, tit for tat with forgiveness.  I do have the capacity though to go beast mode. I am smart, humble, strong, healthy, take good advice. Stress is elevated during this period. The action isn't so bad, its the before and after. The rest period between the next engagement. It really is an intense mental activity. The brain already is a loose monkey with thoughts - add powerful emotions and a dose of battle fear and it can get out of hand rapidly.  Scenarios run throug...

Got a bit of a theme going on lately don't I? Emerging from a dark and cold winter (literally - it has been bloody cold down here). Thinking I need a rest from things. Space from things, from people really. Get back into nature for a week or so. A Dream of Spring...(they would actually be wicked if WoW and DoS came out, I  would take time off to binge read them). The thought on my mind tonight -> How to walk with monsters without becoming one.  But first - the Pareto distribution. Note - not the Pareto law which talks about 80/20 principle. The Pareto distribution. Think how 1% of the world's population has 99% of the money. Think how the top 1% of the top 1% has 99% of the money (in the total 1%). Think how the top 1% of the top 1% of the top 1% has 99% of that money. Stuff gets concentrated. It is a natural law. The top four composers - Mozart, Beethoven, Brahms, Bach - account for most of the classical music you have probably heard in your life. What are the top basketba...

Well yeah - of course. I have that capacity. But most of the time I don't think I am one. I think I'm a swell guy. I aim for a good joke here and there, and comedy is truth, but who doesn't like hearing the truth? At some point everyone gets a little bit touchy of course. It really comes down to who takes themselves seriously or not. How are people's blood sugar levels? How is there emotional state? Do they have PMS? Has their cat just died? Perhaps I can write off the 'being offensive due to trying to bring humour to the world' as an acceptable sacrifice. I think I have a reasonable level of emotional intelligence, I don't make fun of someone's shit new hair style while they are telling me that their mother just had a serious operation. I'm not a monster. Am I vindictive? An eye for an eye leads the whole world blind. The best game theory strategy is tit for tat with forgiveness. I aim for mindfulness, not being attached to societies 'goals for ...

So there is someone I know who is going through the motions. But unlike most people, they do ask the higher type of questions every now and then. They just don't get very far in trying to find an answer. I'm not sure why that is, possibly they aren't in the right environment, don't have habits etc for research and going into their curiosities. They also have poor eyesight. I'd like to give them De Mello book - The Way to Love. In fact I bought them a copy a while back. The problem? It came in really really small size (I don't have this problem as my version is on kindle). I really value the DM book. Awareness and attachments. Manage those two things and life gets a lot more blissful. The person that I know is going through a bit. They are chasing desires, and it is taking its toll on them. I worry that they might not make it, or if they do, they will lose the spark of light they have due to the trauma of it all. Maybe it is selfish - but I'd like them to wak...

Apparently us men are all competing in dominance hierarchies. There are many hierarchies, wealth, physical fitness, iq, social, art. Heck we even make new ones up all the time - look at the bs the olympics has turned into what with all the quasi sports that have been added. Women outsource determining sexual selection to the dominance hierarchy (according to Jordan Peterson, who probably took the idea from someone else). Us males, through competing with each other, often pointlessly, and destructively, do the work for them (those who read stoicism and become aware can for the most part escape).   Lebron James can put a ball into a hoop quite efficiently, so he gets paid lots of money by people, therefore he must be evolutionarily fit (ignore the narcissism and other off the spectrum mental issues). Urghh, its all a bit pointless. Naval talks about rank battles as a necessary evil, best to be avoided if possible. Go for the win-win scenarios. Work with people. Develop value and weal...

 De Mello. You keep reminding me of my programming. The beliefs that have been programmed into me. The reason why I need to strive for x, I'm unhappy until I get x, when I get x I'm only happy for a short while, then I need to strive for y. Yes the never ending insanity of the programming. How to escape it? You advise to become aware. The first step is awareness. You are not your beliefs. The 'needs' are actually mostly 'wants', and mostly you don't want them. Society has told you that you want them. De Mello suggest step back. Look at yourself from afar.  Here is my exercise for today: 1) Belief that I need people to be impressed with my knowledge; 2) Belief that I need to be a helpful part of the tribe; 3) Belief that I need to be doing something to be productive and contribute; 4) Belief that if I am not around, not interacting, I will miss out; 5) Belief that I'll finally get somewhere in the job where systems will be in place and I won't have to...

This happens regularly. You have a cold. It spreads in the house.  Others have colds. Runny noses. Sneezing happens frequently. Tissue quickly get used up. The boxes and packets run empty.  Everyone is too sick and can't be bothered dealing with shopping for rectangular tissue boxes amidst the crisis.  So what is the solution everyone, especially men, go for? Toilet Paper of course. Not the rough stuff - the nice soft three ply. It doesn't have aloe on it, or any of the other crap. It doesn't slowly and annoyingly come out one fragment at a time. It is just in a big convenient cylindrical roll. There is heaps of it, and it can sit quite comfortably on the couch with you (unlike the sharp corners of a rectangular box). Tissues in roll format is really the way to go. Why is it in a box? That isn't helping anyone. Think about it. Probably occurred due to product differentiation. Tissues for faces doesn't want to cobrand with paper for assholes. But you know what, it bl...

Today I wrote an email which ended with "Go away". The go away part was intended as a joke, this person was responding to a trivial request of mine while on holiday. The implication was for this person to go away - and have fun on their break. I immediately wondered if I should clarify that it was a joke after I hit the send button. Add the '...and have fun on your holiday' part. My main motivation being that I don't want to deal with any drama should they take the joke the wrong way. I even drafted the clarification email. But then I hit delete. I left it as it was. Something was holding me back. Drama is about who we want to be. Comedy is about who we are. Comedy generally has elements of truth in it. These were things that ran through my mind. The higher self was trying to get me to focus on something. To become aware. I actually wanted that person to 'go away' for the day - that it was I discovered after some stillness. I recalled driving to work in th...

 When I find myself in times of trouble I decide to be quiet and observe  To be prudent and have awareness To let it be; And when the broken hearted people Cause all sorts of mayhem and chaos Because they are unconscious There will be an answer - let it be; And when the night is cloudy I feel out for the light that shines for me The intelligence in the gap between thoughts So words of wisdom can fall on me Through me To others And let it be

 I read a study once that tested whether surrounding a problem child - a bad apple - with well behaving peers actually helps. The conventional wisdom is that the good children lift the performance of the bad child. What they found was the opposite. The 'bad apple' acts as a black hole which brings down, and in some instances, sinks the performance of the other children. So the take away from that experiment is really that you can lift performance of a group by subtraction rather than addition. hmmmm hmmmm

Thought I would share with you my current 'system' for the work week. I'd burn out by tea time and have no energy to be creative without it. Hopefully you can take something away. First things first. 1) I am not a morning person. So none of this bs wake up at 4.45am to beat everyone. 2) My superpower is my ability to nap at the drop of a hat, frequently (if required), and without ruining my night's sleep. Off we gooooooo:  Sleep (three to four possible locations due to having small children. My bed, spare bed, floor bed 1, floor bed 2 ie mattress moves with me to either child's floor). Wakeup 7.30am. Make bed and drink water. Have shower then *meditate for five to ten minutes. Play with children and possibly bang out a tune on the piano. Drop kids off at school/daycare some days. Drive to work. Remind myself that "I am lucky". Speak affirmation "I will be a famous writer". Think through all the wonderful things I will do that day including a) dri...

 Oh no! Not this again... "Hi We are now launching strategic initiative *fuzzy wuzzy bear hug hug* and are seeking nominations from interested staff who would like to volunteer to be part of this fantastic opportunity.  Bla bla bla Sincerely, Clueless" *Fuzzy wuzzy initiatives = cultural growth, sustainability ideas, innovation hub. Basically bullsh1t wastes of time. Urghhhhhhh The time spent 'volunteering'  of course comes out of the salaried time, so it isn't volunteering (in the true sense) at all. Really it is an excuse for staff to do even less work than they usually do. "Neil, what is the reason you are again late with those end of month reports?" "Well I've spent the last four hours in a brainstorming session on how the business can be seen as more eco friendly to upside down migrating whales." "Is that important?" "Are you questioning the value of strategic cultural building in the organisation?" How about this i...